"He also has problems of liquor" (W. Busch)
We know, or think we know what needs to feel good, satisfied and happy: realize a dream, or simply to complete a successful project. Is this a common conception of happiness undoubtedly recalling the myth of the triumphant warrior, even if he discounted the figure of the self-made man or that of the athlete: you go out winners by a heroic struggle against the opponent's turn, ie against a reality that opposed to our wishes. Thanks to our will, strength, determination, intelligence, cunning, luck or anything else, we ensure that it adheres to our will and gives us what we aspire to, will turn in our project and in our dreams. The triumph makes us experience the thrill of feeling belonging to a kind of elected rulers: we are convinced that men are destined to get what they want, which is in their power to give substance to what they imagine and they can submit reality to their free desire. Their task is commonly thought, would be to design and produce a world better than what they were originally intended.
To tell the truth are many opportunities that we suggest should be a huge imagination to pretend that the man has written in his destiny to conquer and the power to direct their own and others' fate to the horizons happy he can imagine. This not only because, unlike the stories of how to claim a certain film, certain novels or games at the end of our life we \u200b\u200bfind the happy celebration of a happy ending. You can be pretty sure that our story will end in the quiet stillness of a cemetery. We will not, in the end, gloriously to take possession of the land, but the earth will be welcoming us to finally take possession of us. If we learn to become aware of our illusions we soon realize that, apart from temporary and fleeting victories, our destiny is to have to make a rule to deal with partial successes and fleeting, if not with bitter defeats. Instead of a victory we have in fact often, very often, its opposite, namely a setback. And we must come to terms with this architect, for example, something to compensate for the lack of success.
While thus confined only to quantitative assessments, it is understood that efforts would be good not only to get a win, but to always have a surrogate with which console. For this simple reason we should worry first about what to do when you find that instead of waiting and hoped for gratification you get something much, much less. Every time I rocked a hope or confidence to entrust our happiness in the success of a company, we would So good to also think about possible ways out in probable case in which hope is disappointed or betrayed trust. Buy red roses in the exclusive certainty of an evening in good company is, for example, an operation that can cost major depression: nothing is more depressing than seeing their illusions vanish exactly when to put to the test of reality . Wise would complement the romantic thought, for example, booking a night at the bowling alley with friends. It will not be hard to find them an excuse when the roses produce exceptionally the desired effect. Much more difficult would be to stay home to care for his defeat.
only care to make something that can not be achieved with something else that gets easier, you learn to be what is ultimately the man is forced to be: someone who knows he must deal with a reality not just malleable, only partly tamed and unmanageable. We should think of something that, by replacing what we have not complied, may compensate for the pain of a loss of happiness that we had, in the meantime, have quickly begun to enjoy.
How, in fact, happiness is not entirely related to the occurrence of specific events is illustrated by a rather curious with which we experience. The idea that can explode at the time of triumph and only belong to it alone is too schematic and simplistic to account for the complexity, never complete rationality and accessibility of its phenomenology.
One could even say that the fundamental moments of happiness we live them before the time at which you think should unfold fully. Much of human happiness is produced, in fact, already in the trust and hope does not begin only when the expectation is fulfilled or when the promise is kept, but when they start our trust and our hope. Just look in the eyes of those who approach the box office of Lotto, or those who come to the stadium or even of who is entering into a good restaurant. There is still nothing that can explode happiness, yet the light in their eyes tells us that this explosion has already begun to take effect. It is therefore of happiness produced by the possession of which there is concrete, but of what is in place, it anticipates or replace it. We enjoy in any case, in other words, not primarily the surrogate of the original.
Enough, in fact, a little experience of things in life to realize that the victory itself, once reached, it gives us the same happiness that we had imagined. Given that happiness is rarely achieved so complete and satisfying as one had hoped, so is then rely on countless opportunities to achieve it, might as well accept it wisely as well as a desire not fully materialized offers opportunities to be seized in order to meet our aspirations.
human experiences, even when they realize our dreams - not just so disappointing when they brutally - present themselves to us as necessarily imperfect and limited to the comparison of how we fantasize. If successful, it not only blow, leaving you feeling not to have achieved what we were looking for means that we have no way out: we have to get used to accept as inevitable the gap between what we get and what we want. This discrepancy, however, has not only adverse effects, in fact gives us an opportunity too often not considered. is, in fact, a valuable character of our human nature that makes us happy start to desire for perfection that has been foreclosed. For this you can safely say that any of the ideal compensation is a vital necessity not only to not fall into depression but also to continue to design future happiness, and enjoy it straight away. On closer inspection it can be acknowledged in the very constructive dialogue with the imperfection of a replacement warrant to us mortals what the ultimate reward to which we aspire. is a resource for the happiness of us humans if after buying houses and boats, won the heart of the woman, or simply found a bakery with any madeleine childhood, there is always a remnant of dissatisfaction that makes us seek a more fulfilling and more joy complete.
If success is never as exciting as it is in reality ' Imagine what would then be happy if not the fantasy of a future happiness as a substitute for the denied in the present?'s imagination a happiness that has yet to be done cheerfully takes the place of happiness is not yet fully complete. The great cunning and skill to find human replaced, that for example, exchanging cleverly dissatisfaction with the joys of a disappointment of expectation, hope and trust, it is probably our greatest resource. Chagrin incomplete cleverly makes us open to the experience of imaginary completeness. It matters little whether this is through the surrogate of a fantastic performance as the same allows us to take our vital dose of happiness. And more frequently we encounter what we and we are led more and happily imagine what we have and what we can be when our lives will conform to our hopes and our confidence. Precisely this ability to replace a defective happiness - even if real and present - with a perfect happiness - even if fantastic and the future - we can get the compensation of a pleasure, just for luck, will never come to us exactly as we had expected.
consciousness can always count on compensation for the completeness and perfection must give us the knowledge that their distance from the completeness - For example that of the divine - the man knows how to find a way to carve out his chance of fulfillment. It is therefore considered a substitute for all our desire as a way entirely appropriate to satisfaction which man can aspire. It is, in other words, the desire to enhance image of a happiness that can not humanly be fully accomplished, as a source of gratification of man's original and only all closed to the divine. The gods do not know how to find joy in imagining the happiness for the simple reason that they already possess everything. This is fortunate to be prohibited which can have no knowledge and no experience. For this reason, therefore, can not even try and find a replacement. Knowing how deeply feel gratified in incomplete form of a surrogate, then, means that the human being is capable of enjoying human happiness possible and to accept the setback as a fortunate opportunity of its distance from the perfection of the divine. This is, after all, considering his ability to draw nell'astuzia its own weakness, incompleteness and dissatisfaction stimulus to happiness that is possible and is proper. It is not his will to dominate, nor the power over things - a source of illusions and defeats - but the cunning to make the best possible from its weaknesses tool at its disposal to find its balance and its prosperity.
Finding a good substitute and can compensate for all that happiness does not miss requires extraordinary qualities, like those of almost superhuman heroes. There is no need of great courage, daring and reckless deeds that bear witness of heroic virtue. If there are great successes to celebrate, do not even need to have the strength and power of the great conquerors. It takes quite moderate virtues of modesty, wisdom and dell'astuzia because they allow us to try and find what compensates for our failures and our weaknesses. The real man, not the myth of ideological constructions, advertising and all our illusions, nor indicated its peculiarities as to be triumphant, but as a being able to compensate for the missing trumps and make the least possible damage from defeats. Sometimes he even manages to turn in their favor. The human species is a species for the final triumph, but to perpetual defeat. His specialty and its strength is being able to live peacefully in the great enterprise with its large extent and, from time to time, to do so in a profitable way for its balance, its serenity and its gratification.
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